Long and Short Distance Grandparenting
America has changed so much over the past forty-plus years. Years ago, long-distance grandparenting happened, but much less often than it does today. And this happens even when our grandchildren are across town; both situations can be a challenge. We love it when our children visit or we go to see them, but we can often feel disconnected in the busy world we live in.
So, what do we do? How do we stay connected without overdoing it or unconsciously neglecting those we love so much? Here are some ideas we have tried over the years that we trust are helping us connect with our children, grandchildren, and, one day, great-grandchildren. One or two may resonate with you. And if you have any ideas to share, please feel free to share what has helped you connect well with your grandchildren.
1.| Adopt the “Bat Phone” idea. Do you remember when there was a crisis in Gotham City? The bat phone was called, and nothing deterred Batman from taking the call and responding. When my wife and I see one of our children’s names come up on our phones, it is time to set aside what we are doing and tune into the call. The care and attention they sense in that moment help them feel God’s love flowing through us to them. Often, these calls pertain to their children.
2.| Send a regular “Dear Grands” letter. I have been doing this for a decade-plus. When I started this, my grandchildren were not old enough to read, so I asked my children to save these emails to give to their children when they think they are ready. These letters pertain to events happening in our family, attributes about their parents I have seen, family history, and more. I like to have a theme for these letters that will help them in their character growth.
3.| My wife covers the gifts. She thoughtfully matches the gift to the child’s personality and interests. Lately, however, I have begun to think about purchasing meaningful gifts as children step into adolescent life.
4.| Individual time spent with each child is priceless. This may be the most difficult one to accomplish. However, intentional time spent with each child, especially as they get older, is time you would never regret taking. During our last trip to Oregon, I had the chance to do this with my three grandchildren living there. Their youngest child, Mia, picked up on what we were doing. When I went in to say goodnight to her the night before we were to leave early in the morning for Pennsylvania, she said, “Pops, who spent the most time with you while you were here?” I responded, “Of course that was with you, sweetheart!” These are times we never forget!
5.| Pray weekly for each of your children’s families. Our four children know the day we will be praying for them each week. This has been going on for decades. Releasing our children to God’s care each week has become an important facet of our prayer life. Likely, this is the most important of all the ideas shared. As Dick Eastman once said, “Something happens when we pray.”
May God help you to love and connect well with each of your grandchildren!